Guest Blogger Kayla

Hello ladies, it's Kayla again! Like I said in my first blog, I want to focus many of my posts on the infertility aspect of TS. It's not a subject I see discussed often in our community,.but it is an important one. Tomorrow is mother's day. For many of us, this will be a day of joy. But perhaps for some of us TS girls longing to be moms and start their families, it can be a source of pain as well. So how do we manage our hurt and longing? Unfortunately, I have found that you never fully can. However, I have come across some coping techniques that may help lighten the load.
- Feel! Never apologize for or even try to over analyze the emotions that come with infertility. The desire to be a mom has deep roots in hormones and is a chemical response in your brain. It's not something we can always help. So sometimes the best thing to do is just accept the emotions, let them wash over you, and walk through them.
- Seek fellowship. Support groups are a wonderful thing!
- Seek Counciling. One of the best decisions I have made. There is no shame in needing an impartial ear.
- Know and explore your options. You'd be amazed at the options out there for infertial people wanting to start a family. There is hope!
- Work towards a plan of action that works for YOU. Weather you decide to adopt, try IVF, or choose to remain childless, that choice is only yours to make. And nobody else knows best. PERIOD.
- Be honest with yourself. Wether that's knowing what plan is best for you, accepting your physical limitations as a girl with TS, realizing your emotional bounds, or knowing when you just need to sit that old high school friend's baby shower out and send a gift instead.
- Be open. Weather it's to all the world or just one trusted friend, or your spouse, let them know what you are going through. It creates awareness and means you don't have to suffer in silence.
Be proactive. Weather that's saving a little bit, getting your health in order, or whatever it may be. The smallest action that takes you feel like you are one (baby) step closer to your goal is progress indeed and can feel rewarding. And soon you will realize you are your own hope.
Don't take advice lightly. Even this blog! You probably have had a mountian of advice piled on you. But every one of us is unique and so too our journies through infertility. This means we will all have different coping methods and ideas that are best for us as individuals. And that's okay!
THERE IS HOPE!!
I hope you ladies find this helpful. Realize too that I am no more wise than the next person. In fact, I am very much still right there with you, plugging, or rather stumbling, through this heart breaking journey. Just remember there is hope. And no shame in mounds of conciliatory chocolate if need be on Mother's Day.